The Lighter Side

What would cause this?

If you notice the lady carefully she is smoking a cigarette, and moments before she left the Los Cucos where I was sitting, she was drinking a Margarita. If you also notice carefully, you will observe that she is also pregnant. My intention is not to judge, but to wonder what would cause such behavior. Surely she loves her unborn child.

So here is a possible list of reasons why she would do this:

  1. Found out that her husband was cheating on her….with her best friend…in her bed…while she was in the house…drugged by them with sleeping pills
  2. Found out that she can’t take part in the big bang
  3. Stole a car that had 911 written on it, thinking it was a Porshce, only to find out it was a police car
  4. Might have gotten depressed to realize that she was pregnant and now can’t smoke or drink so decided to smoke and drink to relieve some of the pressure
  5. Realized that the female viagra doesnt work
  6. Figured out that the only way to lose all those pounds she’s pounding on is by exercise and diet control

Just when I thought I had seen it all, the blonde walks off, and this cop walks in with a broken bicycle, and I wondered what would have caused this:

  1. He was driving on the road, and some one was speeding, so he tried to pull them over, and held his breath so his face would go red, and held further so it would go blue, and then breath a little so it would go red, in the mean time some one hit him as he was jumping a red light
  2. He pulled some one over for driving a bicycle with only one tire, and they ran away with his cop car and left him with the bicycle with one tire, only to realize that you cant drive a bicylce with one tire
  3. He decided he wanted lose some weight, so traded his pig mobile for a bicycle, and his shear weight caused the front tire to collapse
  4. The front tire went on a strike due to his weight

So later that night, we went to see Robin Hood, and this chic sits right in front of us wearing this cowboy hat. And I can’t understand what would cause this, but I can come up with certain reasons:

  1. She thought it would be too sunny in the theater
  2. She figured it might rain
  3. She was partially bald and had lost her toupe, and had a Nazi sign tattoed on her head patch, with an under text of Fuck the Jews!!
  4. Her brains tried to jump out if she ever took the hat off

She did eventually took the hat off, near the end of the movie, and all of the above were incorrect, except perhaps the last one!!


One thought on “What would cause this?

  1. I appreciate the analysis on these people. Your words of wisdom help me to try and understand the thought process of these people.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s